Saturday, January 16, 2010

Too Much Chittavritti

So today on the bus....



visual: The cool evening breeze called for an old favorite, the avocado green lululemon jacket, my fitted LA Dodgers hat that I some times feel really cool wearing and grey leggings and royal blue flip flops wait for the bus with my navy blue beach cruising bike.



I am having one those weeks where I have over-committed to absolutely everything I could squeeze on my daily planner. Dance show this night, wine with the ladies at my apartment that night, yoga class that day.... And, I am realizing that they all sound wonderful when I say 'yes' to each and every activity, but then the week creeps up and I am just utterly exhausted from this bus to that carpool, from bike to bus again.



As my brain moves in constant motion, I sit on the bus in silence. My best friend, Erin from Indiana calls the Blackberry, a friend I hold so near and dear to my heart. Erin, not the Blackberry. With my busy schedule, where do I fit in my phone conversation and girl talk needs? Right here, right now, on the bus.



Alas, we are chatting and chatting. And, I realize that because I am so busy, I am not able to be inspiring. At all. Not on the phone with Erin or on the bus with my bus friends. Unable to even distinguish the choice of happiness or live in each moment, I am too busy thinking about the moment to come later this evening, or tomorrow morning and on to that next evening already. Who am I being for anyone? For myself?



In yoga, they call this "chittavritti". Now, I share this with you because I think it is all too fun to try and pronounce it. And, it means in our Western World, 'mind chatter'. Well, let me tell you, I have a whole lot of chittavritti going on. And, it is really effecting my entire being.



I have not met anyone on the bus in the past couple days. Am I being uninspiring? I am so busy going here and getting there, I do not even make time to say 'hi' or smile at any of my passenger friends. I do not make the time to allow someone to inspire me and make my day or the rest of my week.



The infamous t0-do list, combined with this chittavritti and the "I don't have time..." excuse is really rocking my core right now. Where is my balance? Am I living my BEST life possible? I have set the weekly intention for balance and quality. I will leave days open. Not say 'yes' to absolutely everything. And make time to just breathe, clear the mind chatter, and do enjoy the ride.

Clear the chittavritti. Ask yourself: Are you living your BEST life today?

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